Jan. 22nd, 2017

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Help me help Rango

that green bean above is Rango, she’s my six year old parakeet who has been struggling with avian gastric yeast since late October, a chronic infection that is difficult to treat and often times fatal because of how rapidly the infected bird can pass away. she’s had monthly and bi-monthly vet visits since October and she’s racked up about $650 worth of treatment so far, but that’s all been covered. today, january 21st, i had to take her in for severe dehydration and vomiting, and the vet needed to take her in and hospitalize her for the next three days (until tuesday). they gave me an estimate of $150-$250 for the hospitalization, which is pretty damn reasonable for an exotic vet. thank you Niles Animal Hospital. 

i put down a down payment of $150 for her, leaving me with depleted funds ($142) in my bank account for the next week…and i’ll still need to pay up to $100 more when i pick her up on tuesday. not counting whatever medication she will come home with which will be extra and is not included in the estimate for her hospitalization, neither are any extra procedures they might undertake while she’s there. i need $100 for her. i commute to work, an hour one way, two hours a day, five days a week, gas is like $50 a week for me (thanks illinois), so even if it’s a flat $100….$42 doesn’t cut it for gas….all in all, things are incredibly tight and the eventual cost for her is an unknown. unknown amounts of money owed is never a good thing.

i set up a youcaring fund for her, $100, if you can’t donate, please share, if you can only donate like a buck, that’s a buck closer to $100. i really don’t like having to do this and i’ve never thought i would have to do this in my entire life, especially since the chances of her surviving are so murky and unclear, but here it is anyways. thanks.

$35! Wow, I never expected anyone to donate anything, thank you!

Holy shit one of you donated $50 and I just….I’m literally crying a little


Good person needs help for perfect little feather child. Help Rango out
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An Article from Neena Susan Thomas

“Through a rapist’s eyes. A group of rapists and date rapists in prison were interview…ed on what they look for in a potential victim and here are some interesting facts:

1] The first thing men look for in a potential victim is hairstyle. They are most likely to go after a woman with a ponytail, bun! , braid, or other hairstyle that can easily be grabbed. They are also likely to go after a woman with long hair. Women with short hair are not common targets.

2] The second thing men look for is clothing. They will look for women who’s clothing is easy to remove quickly. Many of them carry scissors around to cut clothing.

3] They also look for women using their cell phone, searching through their purse or doing other activities while walking because they are off guard and can be easily overpowered.

4] The number one place women are abducted from / attacked at is grocery store parking lots.

5] Number two is office parking lots/garages.

6] Number three is public restrooms.

7] The thing about these men is that they are looking to grab a woman and quickly move her to a second location where they don’t have to worry about getting caught.

8] If you put up any kind of a fight at all, they get discouraged because it only takes a minute or two for them to realize that going after you isn’t worth it because it will be time-consuming.

9] These men said they would not pick on women who have umbrellas,or other similar objects that can be used from a distance, in their hands.

10] Keys are not a deterrent because you have to get really close to the attacker to use them as a weapon. So, the idea is to convince these guys you’re not worth it.


1] If someone is following behind you on a street or in a garage or with you in an elevator or stairwell, look them in the face and ask them a question, like what time is it, or make general small talk: can’t believe it is so cold out here, we’re in for a bad winter. Now that you’ve seen their faces and could identify them in a line- up, you lose appeal as a target.

2] If someone is coming toward you, hold out your hands in front of you and yell Stop or Stay back! Most of the rapists this man talked to said they’d leave a woman alone if she yelled or showed that she would not be afraid to fight back. Again, they are looking for an EASY target.

3] If you carry pepper spray (this instructor was a huge advocate of it and carries it with him wherever he goes,) yelling I HAVE PEPPER SPRAY and holding it out will be a deterrent.

4] If someone grabs you, you can’t beat them with strength but you can do it by outsmarting them. If you are grabbed around the waist from behind, pinch the attacker either under the arm between the elbow and armpit or in the upper inner thigh – HARD. One woman in a class this guy taught told him she used the underarm pinch on a guy who was trying to date rape her and was so upset she broke through the skin and tore out muscle strands the guy needed stitches. Try pinching yourself in those places as hard as you can stand it; it really hurts.

5] After the initial hit, always go for the groin. I know from a particularly unfortunate experience that if you slap a guy’s parts it is extremely painful. You might think that you’ll anger the guy and make him want to hurt you more, but the thing these rapists told our instructor is that they want a woman who will not cause him a lot of trouble. Start causing trouble, and he’s out of there.

6] When the guy puts his hands up to you, grab his first two fingers and bend them back as far as possible with as much pressure pushing down on them as possible. The instructor did it to me without using much pressure, and I ended up on my knees and both knuckles cracked audibly.

7] Of course the things we always hear still apply. Always be aware of your surroundings, take someone with you if you can and if you see any odd behavior, don’t dismiss it, go with your instincts. You may feel little silly at the time, but you’d feel much worse if the guy really was trouble.


1. Tip from Tae Kwon Do: The elbow is the strongest point on your body. If you are close enough to use it, do it.

2. Learned this from a tourist guide to New Orleans : if a robber asks for your wallet and/or purse, DO NOT HAND IT TO HIM. Toss it away from you…. chances are that he is more interested in your wallet and/or purse than you and he will go for the wallet/purse. RUN LIKE MAD IN THE OTHER DIRECTION!

3. If you are ever thrown into the trunk of a car: Kick out the back tail lights and stick your arm out the hole and start waving like crazy. The driver won’t see you but everybody else will. This has saved lives.

4. Women have a tendency to get into their cars after shopping,eating, working, etc., and just sit (doing their checkbook, or making a list, etc. DON’T DO THIS! The predator will be watching you, and this is the perfect opportunity for him to get in on the passenger side,put a gun to your head, and tell you where to go. AS SOON AS YOU CLOSE the DOORS , LEAVE.

5. A few notes about getting into your car in a parking lot, or parking garage:

a. Be aware: look around your car as someone may be hiding at the passenger side , peek into your car, inside the passenger side floor, and in the back seat. ( DO THIS TOO BEFORE RIDING A TAXI CAB) .

b. If you are parked next to a big van, enter your car from the passenger door. Most serial killers attack their victims by pulling them into their vans while the women are attempting to get into their cars.

c. Look at the car parked on the driver’s side of your vehicle, and the passenger side. If a male is sitting alone in the seat nearest your car, you may want to walk back into the mall, or work, and get a guard/policeman to walk you back out. IT IS ALWAYS BETTER TO BE SAFE THAN SORRY. (And better paranoid than dead.)

6. ALWAYS take the elevator instead of the stairs. (Stairwells are horrible places to be alone and the perfect crime spot).

7. If the predator has a gun and you are not under his control, ALWAYS RUN! The predator will only hit you (a running target) 4 in 100 times; And even then, it most likely WILL NOT be a vital organ. RUN!

8. As women, we are always trying to be sympathetic: STOP IT! It may get you raped, or killed. Ted Bundy, the serial killer, was a good-looking, well educated man, who ALWAYS played on the sympathies of unsuspecting women. He walked with a cane, or a limp, and often asked “for help” into his vehicle or with his vehicle, which is when he abducted his next victim.

Send this to any woman you know that may need to be reminded that the world we live in has a lot of crazies in it and it’s better safe than sorry.

If u have compassion reblog this post.
‘Helping hands are better than Praying Lips’ – give us your helping hand.

So please reblog this….Your one reblog can Help to spread this information.


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This, this is an insult and, furthermore, someone fucking with what belongs to him. This is not going to go unpunished. (And Graves, in the meantime, is being taken care of by his uncle, because you do not just get over torture like that and I imagine that Grindelfuck broke his legs to make sure he couldn’t get away or something similar. Jerry can’t just heal him because I headcanon that one of the trade offs for being turned is losing your magic if you’re a witch or a wizard).

Yes. Oh, yes. This is lovely!

The fact that the Graves family is haunted by a vampire isn’t really a secret, per se. It’s more along the lines of personal information that they tend to keep quiet - their ongoing feud with their batshit-insane many-times great-uncle is private, that’s all, and, well, family is family. All it would take is Seraphina absently commenting on how the days were getting shorter, best of luck with your uncle, and Grindelwald would immediately start researching - he can’t take the chance and an unknown relative of Graves’ will show up and spoil everything. From there - well. Graves does have a family portrait labeled ‘Uncle Jerry’ (he mainly throws darts at it when he’s angry before almost guiltily charming it whole again, it’s a family antique), and it wouldn’t take long to figure out exactly who the man is. 

Jerry would be insulted - listen, cupcake, the only person who can stalk, wound, and horribly traumatize my family is me! Graves, meanwhile, is relatively sure that he’s hallucinating - after all, he’d anticipate Uncle Jerry walking into the sunlight before he would every spoon-feed his many-times great-nephew chicken soup before dragging him to a no-Maj hospital.

Jerry, for his part, is extremely cheered the first time he walks into Graves’ hospital room only to run into a line of faintly glowing runes scrawled on the floor in an hasty ward. He only has a moment to see his distant relative glaring at him from the bed before Graves snarling the activating word; the vampire is then messily blasted backwards as Graves begins hastily changing a dedication ritual meant to encompass the entire damn hospital.
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So, I’ve been pulled over a few times in my life. Not many, but a few. And I’ve also been in a couple of cars that got pulled over. And let me tell you, if you were actually doing something wrong, the officer doesn’t make any small talk, just straight into “I clocked you doing 70 in a 55.” The only time I’ve ever gotten the “do you know why I pulled you over?” was the time when I wasn’t doing anything wrong, and I got let go even though he insisted to the end that I was doing 87 in a 70 (white privilege at work).

“Do you know why I pulled you over?” is a trap. It means there’s a good chance the officer doesn’t actually have a good reason to ticket you, and is trying to get you to waive your 5th Amendment rights and incriminate yourself. If you make a guess, that’s a confession of guilt.

But there’s another trap, that I’ve heard of but haven’t yet experienced. It’s “do you know how fast you were going?” With that one, they’re hoping you’ll say no, because then they can name whatever speed they want – you just said you didn’t know how fast you were going, if you deny the speed they name then you’re lying to them.

Oh, I’ve had that one. Go with “yes.” Don’t give them a number, just say “Yes.” Then they still have to offer a number and you can deny it without contradicting yourself. They could just ask you, at that point, but that’s suspiciously similar to saying they don’t know, and they tend to avoid doing that.

Reblog to save a life
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Unfollow me if you wish, but this blog will NEVER support Trump and instead supports the LGBT community, racial minorities, women, people with disabilities, immigrants, Muslims, Jewish people, and anyone else who is afraid now. I am with you, and this will always be a safe space for you.
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TPM AU where Padme has a (completely obvious) teenage crush on Padawan Obi-Wan. Little Anakin is slightly upset before promptly deciding he’ll just have to marry them both once he’s old enough. It might require a little matchmaking, and years of trademark Skywalker wooing, but it will happen. He’s sure of it.            

Oh my bleep.

It’s just… the tags OMG

#Anakin: HOW DARE #Anakin: ALRIGHT FINE you can come too #tatooine being poly by default is an interesting thought #i mean the planet is super dangerous and so if you’re going to try to make a living #pooling the resources of multiple adults into the children is actually a pretty smart idea??? #owen and beru never bothered because even if they weren’t married to him they had ben kenobi #cleigg and shmi never had the chance :( #somewhere in the back of anakin’s brain ‘smart/fierce girl + snarky/wary knight = winning combination’ #he spends the next ten years tryina show what he can bring to the table (which is a hella lot tbh) #like ……… he’s realized that’s not how it works in the whole wide galaxy bUT STILL #he’s totally forgotten to actually tell Padme and Obi-Wan about this #‘there was a slight complication when you turned out to be a Q U E E N but’ #Obi-Wan is just ‘why are you like this …. I love you but why’ #Amidala is just lmao SUPER FLATTERED once she understands the cultural aspects of it #‘Ani pls no …. I mean its a great honor buT PLS ANI WHY’ #Anakin’s just stubbornly ‘no as far as Im concerned we are M A R R I E D’ #Obi-Wan and Padme who had no plans/a vow against it are just ’ ….. fine okay sure wtvr’ #It’s not like they’re actually going to get married to anyone else so ………… #Padme uses it to ward off obnoxious dignitaries #Obi-Wan just endlessly torments Anakin about it #‘As your husband -’ ‘Obi no’ ‘BUT as your husband you should listen closer-’ ‘Obi stop’        

can you imagine how this continues? I wonder when Ani told them of their happy union.

and then Vos came back from the outer rim and some mission, and he was like: Obi-what???

:D i live to tag

okay it’s clearly an au from the get-go so ani and padme never have their super secret marriage in AotC because it would be IMPROPER to have a ceremony without Obi obviously

so some time during TCW obviously it comes up all of a sudden when Padme has either strong-armed her way into a dangerous situation and Anakin is like “OUR WIFE” and Obi is like “What” or otherwise another hilarious cultural gaffe ALA Star Trek when Anakin and Obi-Wan run into another culture and they’re like “they want one of you to marry into the culture as good faith” and Anakin is like “WE CAN’T we have a wife/we’re married already!!!” and Obi is like “what”

alternatively I’ve developed this headcanon that cleigg was actually pointed shmi’s way because Obi-Wan asked one of his bffs to do something about that situation back on Tatooine and it just so happened that cleigg was like “I love this woman, Imma marry her”

and that BFF, who knows something about the local population’s culture (as opposed to the hutts, as opposed to the smugglers/pirates/scum hiding out there temporarily) sees Anakin do something and is like “wow congrats obi, are you aware you have a husband>?>????”

which accounts for part of Anakin’s attitude/authority problem, because in his head, he’s just like “okay yeah we’re married” and Obi isn’t affording him the respect a partner deserves and he’s SO MAD ABOUT IT but WHATEVER, so miscommunication + cultural misunderstanding yaaay

like Anakin had it in his head somewhere that when he was knighted then they would be Officially Married and just …never told anyone …..

alternatively some dignitary making eyes at Padme and Anakin being like “exCUSE ME???!?!? WE’RE RIGHT HERE??!?!!! HER HUSBANDS?????!!!!” and both padme and obi are “what” but padme rolls with it on the fly even though she has no idea what the fuck anakin is talking about.

they both learn to roll with it after padme manages to get her hands on some tatooine culture information and she and obi-wan talk it over. anakin doesn’t seem to have any unusual expectations of the situation given that he’s been thinking of them all as married for years now so it’s not like it puts Obi-Wan or Padme in an uncomfortable position?? Anakin finally starts getting the recognition and respect he’s been wanting all this time.

On the downside:
“As your husband-”
“but as your wife-”

anakin’s easy days are over

like Anakin had it in his head somewhere that when he was knighted then they would be Officially Married and just …never told anyone …..

oh, but they probably WERE Officially Married after Anakin’s knighting. Officially Married according to Tatooine custom, but still. It’s not Anakin’s fault that Obi-Wan went along with it and didn’t admit he had no idea what it meant when they had meal with three traditional wedding dishes and exchanged cups of water. 

(Obi-Wan assumed it was a coming-of-age ritual. He didn’t catch on to his mistake even when Anakin insisted that they go visit Padme and then cooked the same dishes and insisted that it’s only proper they all exchange the water between them.

It didn’t help the whole thing is really simple out of necessity. It’s not like people of Tatooine can afford elaborate weddings, after all.) 

This tbh. Sharing water under the light of the sun (or perhaps during the night?  …. im only now questioning if Tatooine has a night lmao orz) with everyone involved, perhaps saying Something of Significance.

I really think it ought to be everyone at the same time honestly. Obi-Wan and Padme just think it’s (like you said) a kind of celebration or ritual done because Anakin gets knighted.

“Padme has to be there,” Anakin insists, and Obi-Wan sighs. Anakin’s transparent attachment to the Senator will surely come to trouble, but he’s young yet - he’ll grow out of it. Of course he will. And there’s nothing to truly gain out of denying him this. Obi-Wan remembers that his friends had celebrations when they were Knighted. Just because he himself had forgone any festivities holds no weight on that. “Fine, fine,” he says, “if the Senator has time.”

Anakin bites his lip and furrows his brow stubbornly. “She’ll have time,” he says uncertainly.

Padme certainly won’t pass up a chance to see Obi-Wan again, and she has become very fond of the young man Ani has grown into, so she manages to make time in her schedule to meet with them. “It’s a very important moment for both of them,” she tells her handmaidens. “Ani’s training is over, and Obi-Wan should be very proud of him.”

“Uh huh,” the handmaiden says, not at all convinced.

Anakin fucking glows the entire night, and well - he has always felt things strongly, so there’s no real reason to wonder at it, is there? His happiness is infectious, and if the small, private celebration seems a bit more exuberant than a knighting usually inspires, well - it’s Anakin.

In AotC and the Clone Wars movie, we see that at night there are three moons visible from Tatooine. So maybe when it’s three (or third person entering into the relationship, or more people at once?) people getting married, the ceremony is supposed to be in the evening/at night but when it’s only two people, they marry at day (because two suns).

Also, if sharing water is the most important part of the marriage, it probably carries similar connotations when done right in other contexts. Like, if dignitaries at official dinner are making eyes at Obi-Wan or Padme, Anakin will bring his spouses water (it HAS to be water, nothing alcoholic) to make clear they’re taken. All the while glaring daggers at the offending parties, of course.

Padme just rolls with it. Meanwhile, Obi-Wan is convinced Anakin is trying to get across the message that he’s drinking too much.

I love this whole thing.

Just wanted to add - some dignitaries (particularly those who are from the Outer Rim or have a lot of dealings with Outer Rim or are from desert planets with similar customs) recognize the warning and immediately back tf off because you do NOT mess with someone’s spouses. Which just leaves Obi-Wan confused about their sudden stiff politeness and wariness towards him. 

He’d thought the negotiations were going well? Did he misspeak on something? Did he just commit a faux pas? He’d studied this planet’s cultural practices, though, and he’d been careful (as he always is) not to overstep. What did he do???

And why is Anakin insisting on giving him more water? He’s already had three glasses of water to just one glass of alcohol this dinner. He is not drinking too much, thanks for your unsolicited concern, Anakin.


I can only imagine how INCREDIBLY upset Anakin is in this AU every time Obi-Wan inevitably starts to flirt with someone that isn’t Anakin himself or Padme. Obi-Wan isn’t respecting the sanctity of their marriage!!!

Oh Force, what if this is Obi-Wan’s way of telling Anakin that he’s not happy in their relationship??? 

…what if this is Obi-Wan’s way of telling Anakin that he feels like he’s being neglected by Anakin???

Cue Anakin hovering around Obi-Wan nonstop and being incredibly, embarrassingly solicitous. 

Meanwhile, Obi-Wan is SO CONFUSED. And embarrassed. And really, really irritated.

“Anakin, I have my own food right here,” he sighs, pushing away Anakin’s hand yet again. He supposes this is Anakin’s way of reminding him that he needs to eat more food.

Anakin, meanwhile, thinks that this obviously means the choice bits of food that he’s trying to feed Obi-Wan aren’t good enough. Or that this is Obi-Wan’s way of saying that he’s still upset with him, so he needs to try harder.

Maybe it needs to be food he’s prepared with his own two hands?? Maybe he wants to be serenaded at the same time???

(Of course, it’s a different story if Obi-Wan isn’t the one who started the flirting with Random Diplomat #5/Ventress/Satine/Quinlan/Hondo/anything with a pulse. Then Anakin just gets territorial in the extreme. Which sometimes amounts to the same actions on his part in the end, only with more snarling at the other being added into the mix.)

Obi-Wan and Padme bond over Anakin’s weird behavior long before they have any idea of its true meaning.

“Wait… he does that thing where he tries to feed you from his plate at state banquets to you too?”

“Unfortunately, yes,” Obi-Wan replies, blinking in surprise.

They swap stories (Padme is currently winning the Most Embarrassing Anakin Moment competition) and coping tips and get thoroughly smashed on the bottles of Alderaanian Rosé Padme received as a gift from Bail on her last nameday.

When Anakin comes into Padme’s apartment in the aftermath of this bonding session, he sees them drunkenly napping against one another on the couch and is all, My spouses are so cute!!!

He’s kinda grumpy and jealous about having been excluded, though. Just for this, he thinks sulkily, he isn’t going to bring them breakfast or match his clothes to theirs for a whole week. Unless they apologize, of course. 

That will teach them!
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Can I put forwards a petition for Graves’ animagus form to be a black smoke Norwegian forest cat? I mean.

Majestic as fuck.

100% done with your shit.

Bitching black and silver colour scheme and a boss coat.

Fanged death machine that strikes terror into the hearts of prey dark wizards and manages to look hella fine while doing so

paint me like one of your french girls

So I can’t stop thinking about this post. ><

Since I’m terrible at contributing to headcanons, I can only offer this humble (and unfinished) drabble:

There was a black cat sitting primly beside the entrance of the Woolworth building when Newt headed out that drizzly gray Friday evening.

It watched him with a piercing golden gaze as he exited, seemingly unaffected by the chilly bite of the night air and the smattering of rain that struck it periodically when the wind changed directions. Contrary to its regal demeanour however, the cat was a sorry sight physically, bedraggled fur dotted with splatters of mud and patches of missing fur.

“Oh,” Newt murmured quietly, careful not to startle the feline, “hello there.”

He carefully knelt down when the cat did not immediately react and slowly extended his palm out. Newt lowered his gaze and waited patiently, alert for any sounds from his feline companion. After several minutes of inactivity, he considered lowering his hand, having decided that the lack of response was likely an indicator of disinterest.

Just as he was about to do so, Pickett peeked out from his pocket and made a small inquisitive noise.

Newt heard, more than saw, the cat flinch.

He lifted his gaze high enough to stare at the cat’s chest and said softly, “don’t be alarmed, I promise that Pickett is very friendly.”

Newt smiled slightly when the cat got up onto four paws and padded closer, but kept his gaze low until it tentatively reached his still outstretched hand. To his surprise, instead of sniffing at his hand, the cat padded right past and straight up to Newt where it sat down again.

When Newt got over his surprise and took a proper look at the feline, he noticed that it appeared to be glaring at Pickett.

For a scruffy stray, it seemed surprisingly fierce, and Newt absolutely did not blame Pickett when the Bowtruckle quavered under the cat’s watchful gaze and shrank back into Newt’s pocket.

Apparently unsatisfied, the cat made to move closer, boldly placing its paws onto Newt’s thighs, intent on climbing its way up.

“Oh,” said Newt, thoroughly taken aback, “I’m afraid I can’t let you scare poor Pickett.”

An irritated chitter came from his pocket and Newt winced apologetically. “Quite right Pickett.”

He smiled ruefully down at the black cat. “Excuse my poor wording just now, Pickett is definitely not afraid, he’s just trying to give you space.”

He suppressed a wider smile when the cat sat back on its haunches and made a huffing snort.

This close, Newt can see the stray was not only dirty, but severely underfed. The girth he had assumed to be a healthy amount of weight turned out to be nothing more than knotted, but still fluffy, fur.

Newt’s heart clenched.

He offered his hand out to the feline again, fervently wanting to scoop the poor thing into his arms but unwilling to intrude upon its space without proper permission.

When the cat continued to simply watch him with a narrow-eyed gaze, Newt found himself speaking again. “My name is Newt Scamander,” he said, “and I would very much like to treat you to dinner.”

For another tense moment, the cat simply sat there and Newt had the impression that the feline was thinking, weighing Newt’s worth with its golden gaze.

Abruptly, it got onto its paws again. Stepping closer, the stray sniffed delicately at his index finger before pushing its head against his hand briefly. Newt ducked his head to hide a pleased smile and allowed himself to inch closer, keeping his movements deliberately slow so the cat can move away if necessary.

It didn’t, though it did tense again when Newt carefully ran his hand down its back.

“You’re absolutely lovely,” Newt told it quietly, “won’t you come home with me tonight?”

The cat gave him another considering look, then, strangely enough, it turned away to stare intensely at the entrance of the Woolworth building.

Newt followed its gaze. He frowned, and moved closer to the door closest to him. There appeared to be scratch marks on the wooden panelling, as if-

He looked down and met the cat’s intelligent gaze. “Were you-” he stopped himself and rephrased his question, “do you want to go inside?”

Newt’s eyes widened when the cat nodded.

He stared down at it.

The cat gave an impatient huff when several seconds passed and Newt had not moved. Startled into action, Newt stood up and took a step back, suddenly all too aware of the events of the past few days and the entirely unpleasant events with Grindelwald. He discreetly felt for his wand and tried to quiet his heart as it began to pound anxiously in his chest.

“I’m afraid I can’t let you in,” he told the cat, trying to sound firm.

Instead of lashing out or transforming into a Dark Wizard or a million other scenarios Newt’s suspicious mind conjured up, the cat merely looked begrudgingly resigned. It seemed to shrink into itself and made no move to approach Newt.

After a beat, the cat turned away and slunk back to its original spot by the entrance. Only, instead of sitting down, it moved closer to the door and curled into a small ball, heedless of the wet ground or the continued existence of the rain.

Newt watched helplessly from his spot.

After a minute, he bit his bottom lip and casted an Impervius Charm on the stray. Then, he forced himself to look away and Apparate back to his hotel.

He did the right thing, Newt told himself firmly as he went through his suitcase and fed all his creatures. There was something odd about the cat, and as much as Newt wanted to help, he can’t allow it entrance into the MACUSA headquarters without a better understanding of what it was.

Because there was no way it was a normal Muggle cat.

Still, Newt couldn’t help the pang in his chest when he came out of his case and noticed the rain had gotten stronger in the intervening time.

He hoped the charm would last the night.

Newt does not see the black cat the next morning.

He dithered by the Woolworth building entrance, under the pretense of purchasing and reading a Muggle newspaper. During this time, he saw countless Muggles, wizards and witches enter and exit but never once caught a glimpse of the stray from last night.

It seemed unlikely that anyone would have stopped to let the cat in.

Newt was familiar enough with Muggle laws to understand that strays are not usually tolerated in public spaces, and whilst he has not yet encountered an animal control officer or an animal shelter during his stay in New York. He had no doubt that they existed and, given his experiences with said institutions in the past, would likely be very unforgiving with the black cat’s life.

Perhaps it had snuck inside after someone?

Unlikely again, Newt concluded after some thought, if the cat simply wanted to sneak inside, it could easily have done so last night, when Newt exited the building. He was broken out of his thoughts when the Muggle newspaper purveyor cleared his throat pointedly. Realizing that he has easily stood outside of the entrance for more than fifteen minutes, Newt ducked his head and entered the building.

Once inside, Newt spent the next half an hour trying to track down either Tina or Queenie. There was something decidedly strange about the stray from the prior night, and he wanted to inform one of the Goldstein sisters if his suspicions are proven to be correct.

Eventually, he spied Queenie as she strode purposefully down one of the hallways and hurried to catch her. Queenie slowed when he approached and turned around with a pleased smile. “Good morning,” she greeted happily, seemingly unconcerned when Newt flashed her shoes a brief smile in response. She then said, with a small frown, “oh. That is indeed odd.”

Newt ducked his head, quietly glad that Queenie agreed with his assessment of last night’s events. “Yes, I thought so as well.” He briefly peered up at her thoughtful expression before looking back down and staring at her chin, trying to concentrate on visualizing the intensity of the cat’s gaze. “It seemed so intelligent.”

Queenie hummed in acquiescence before tugging Newt gently closer to her. “We should drop by and see if dear Tina has a moment to chat.”

Newt nodded and disentangled himself from her grip, which Queenie relinquished with a slightly apologetic grin. Instead, she began moving again, in the opposite direction this time, seemingly turning down corridors at random until at last, they turned right one last time and came across a harried looking Tina.

She was in discussion with several other Aurors, heads bent together conspiratorially and murmuring in soft voices.

As they drew closer however, Newt was able to catch snippets of their conversation and realized idly that they were discussing the search for their Director and, judging by the exhaustion on their faces, he concluded that they likely haven’t had any success.

Tina had noticed them by now, and carefully extricated herself out of the group, gesturing that she would be back. She moved to greet them with a small nod, smiling fondly at her sister before turning the same expression onto Newt.

She must have noticed something on his face because she immediately frowned. “Is everything alright Newt?”

“Oh, yes,” Newt said, then added uncertainly, “only I had the strangest encounter with a most fascinating creature last night.”

Tina tensed. “What was it? Wait, where is it now?” She questioned and glanced down quickly at his suitcase with a furrow in her brows which belied her unease at the thought of Newt acquiring yet another largely prohibited beast.

Newt shook his head and peered up at Tina’s chin. “It was a cat actually.”

She visibly relaxed, shoulders slumping with a relieved sigh. She must have caught sight of Newt’s slightly offended pout because she straightened again and inquired in a more collected voice. “A cat?”

“Yes, it was behaving in a decidedly strange manner,” affirmed Queenie from the side, “it seemed to understand Newt’s speech.”

Newt found himself nodding along with that description. “It was trying to get into the building,” he continued, “it had left visible scratches on the wooden panelling of the door but had likely stopped once it realized the futility of the action in its current form.”

“Current form,” Tina said, then trailed off, “you don’t suppose it could be an Animagus?”

Newt darted a look at her face, taking in the worried downturn of her lips with a small pang of regret. The aftermath of Grindelwald’s deception has not been easy on MACUSA, and having been re-instigated as an Auror, Tina has been running around along with the rest of the Department, trying to tie down loose ends around the city. The toll of the long work hours was visible in the dark circles under her eyes and they made her seem especially pale under the dim light of the hallways. 

“I’m afraid I can’t say for certain. It exhibited intelligence far beyond what is commonly attributable to the species, though it is unclear if this is simply an anomaly, an Animagus, a Transfiguration or something else. However,” he paused until Tina looked at him again, “it did not attack me when I refused to grant it entrance.”

“Oh,” said Queenie in a small voice when Newt thought of the last time he saw the stray, how it had curled its malnourished and dirty form into a tight ball against the door, as if that would be enough to keep out the chill. “Poor dear.”

Tina gave her sister a puzzled look but let the comment slide in favour of the more pressing issue. “Is the cat in your possession?”

Newt shook his head. “It, ah, did not seem interested in coming with me and I did not see it when I came in this morning.”

“Thank you for alerting us, though I’m not sure there is anything the Department can do for now,” Tina sighed and turned an apologetic look at Newt. “Grindelwald’s schemes have left us quite short handed. And between the restorations to the city, clean up within the Department and the search for Director Graves, I’m not certain the Madame President will be willing to spare any Auror to investigate into this, especially not with the new wards they’ve put up.”

“New wards?”

Tina nodded at Newt. “Not fully sure of the specifications myself, but I understand that new wards are able to detect the individual’s wands and are meant to deny entrance to those without a registered wand in good standing in the system.”

Newt mulled over the implications for a few seconds and nodded his head. “This would explain why it could not simply sneak in through the doors.”

“Yes,” agreed Tina. She twitched when one of the Aurors called her name and gave them a brief smile, reaching out to briefly touch Newt’s arm. “That’s my cue, there’s been rumours that Grindelwald kept a warehouse down by the docks for his,” she grimaced, “prisoners. Thank you for informing me, I’ll be sure to warn the others to keep an eye out.”

Newt smiled back and ducked his head. “I hope you find him soon.”

“Me too,” said Tina quietly.

The cat was back by the time Newt left the Woolworth building that night.

He stared at it from under the fringe of his bangs and was fiercely glad that the weather tonight was a significant improvement from the prior eve. He didn’t think he would have the heart to leave the poor thing again, even if it was a Dark Wizard in disguise.

Newt had spent the remainder of the day secluded within the confines of the library within the Woolworth building, pouring over what little information there was on Animagus transformations, Transfigurations and potential spells to detect magical deceptions. He had intended to leave around ten, only Newt had found a particularly detailed dissertation on the transference of physical attributes to the Animagus form and gotten lost in the discussion, and by the time he finished, it was close to midnight.

Newt watched the cat.

It was sitting by the doors again and had perked up briefly when Newt stepped through, but upon recognizing Newt, it made a huffing sound and flicked its tail once.

Newt swallowed, and turned so he was facing the feline properly.

It stared back at him.

“Good evening,” Newt said carefully and palmed his wand in what he thought was a discreet manner. He bit the inside of his cheek when the cat immediately tensed and stared at where his hand was gripping his wand inside his jacket.

Definitely not a normal cat.

Newt observed its sudden wariness and made a split decision, unable to bring himself to cast anything on the creature without provocation. He loosened his grip on his wand and slowly withdrew his hand, watching as the cat fully relaxed once his hand was completely out of his pocket.

“You’re not just a cat, are you?” Newt asked.

The black cat swished its tail once, and Newt got the distinct impression that it was very unimpressed with his deductions. Regardless, after a moment’s hesitation, it shook its head.

Newt suppressed the instinctive sense of apprehension that flared bright in his mind, aware again of his current isolation and the lateness of the hour. He forcibly told himself to take a deep breath and continued. “You can understand me.”

This time, there was no hesitation. The cat nodded.

“Are you,” Newt began then stopped. He rethought his plan and instead said, “will you trust me?”

This seemed to give the cat pause, because it made a low growl in the back of its throat and tensed again.

Pickett stirred in Newt’s shirt pocket and made an inquisitive noise. Newt reached up to place a comforting hand over his pocket, offering silent reassurance to the Bowtruckle. He knelt down slowly and reached out his hand again, a reenactment of his actions from the prior night. “Will you trust me?”

The cat watched him with its golden gaze and Newt forced himself to meet its eyes. Now that he was certain this was not an actual Muggle cat, he was no longer worried that it would interpret his direct gaze as a challenge.


Newt held his breath as the cat slowly padded up to his proffered hand. It does not rub its head against his hand again, instead, it simply placed a paw in his hand.

Newt smiled.

“I’m going to cast a few spells on you,” he told it quietly, and does not wince when it responded by digging its claws pointedly into his palm. “You need to trust me.”

It huffed at him and flicked its tail against his hand, but it does not react when Newt reached into his pocket for his wand again.

“Revelio,” Newt said.

Nothing, not a simple Transformation spell then.

“Finite Incantatem,” he tried.

Again, nothing.

Newt frowned down at the cat. “Reparifarge.”

The cat huffed.

That only left one other option, the spell to force Animagus to transform back into human form. Newt steeled himself for a confrontation and casted the Homorphous Charm.

A bright blue and white glow settled over the cat’s form and Newt gasped. He gripped his wand tighter and readied himself for a fight. Only, the light quickly faded away and left a distinctly grumpy looking feline.

The cat hissed at him and lifted its paw from his palm with the wounded dignity of the deeply offended.

“What,” said Newt then winced when the cat gave him a particularly spiteful scratch. He stared down at it and said faintly, “well then, I suppose we might as well as get dinner.”

It scowled at him.

Hi. Scroll back up. Read the story. Thank you.

Please, may we have some more?
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I was reading one of the Fantastic Beasts tie-in books and came across this!


“…everyone but Newt.”

OMG, Newt Scamander, Mother of Dragons. Or their hatchling however you want to look at it. My headcanon is confirmed. This is a good day!


!!!!! yes

The dragons have adopted Newt. It’s causing issues. They barbeque anyone who even looks at him now and they’ve started bringing him half dead cows to teach him to hunt. One of them tried to push him off a mountain because it thought that would help Newt learn to fly. Four of them then caught Newt when it did not help him learn to fly and the one that pushed him delivered a yeti liver as an apology. A new dragon has hatched and has decided that Newt is the most amazing Big Brother Ever and it keeps trying to walk on two legs like he does. The dragons have taught Newt their language. Calls have gone out through the worldwide dragon network: one of our kids is stuck in a small and squishy bipedal form, what do? The answers trickle in and Newt is stuffed in various ancient armours hoarded from the age of knights and questing. Legends resurface from the far east about koi fish who could become dragons; the Ironbellies remember their own legends of serpents that could do the same. One particularly brave dragon volunteers to take Newt with her to find the Dragon Gate waterfall and see if leaping up it will work as well for Newts as it does for the koi. Grandma dragon calls this ridiculous nonsense and maintains that Newt is clearly stunting his growth by not eating. She steals him in the middle of the night and teaches him how to catch mountain goats with flame throwers.

Somewhere, there’s a war going on, but no one really cares about that anymore.

Oh my goodness, just imagine Newt introducing Graves to his Dragon Family, and Dragon Family overreacting when they discover that Newt has taken a mate, our precious baby hatchling is all grown up, wait, does this mean that we’re going to be grandparents? GRANDBABIES!
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AU where the Justice League forms like usual, except Batman maintained his “totally a myth” status and has in fact been active for years before the JL forms. He’s very cautious about trusting them, but still joins, and the others sort of accepts that as long as they trust that Batman has a really hard time with trust, it will all work out in its own weird way

Then, one day, in the middle of a JL mission, the League gets in a tight spot. Out of nowhere, this blue and black blur swoops in and saves everyone’s ass. Maybe breaking some shackles that were proving very difficult, maybe disarm a bomb that the League was just a hair’s breadth too slow to reach without help, but whatever happens, the shadowy figure pauses just long enough to say, “Hey, Batman, you know you there are these things called cellphones now and you can just call sometimes, it doesn’t have to be this dramatic?” and bounds away after shouting ‘let’s do brunch! Bring your new friends!’

Batman is mortified.

No one lets it go.

The entire rest of the mission, the whole League is asking so many questions. Who was that? Do you know him? How do you know him? What’s going on? I didn’t know there was a vigilante in this area?? They don’t let up until he talks.

“That was Nightwing.” Batman is mumbling. The JL forces him to bring them to the Brunch. Brunch happens to be in a run-down apartment on the edge of a bad neighborhood, at five in the morning, in costume. Nightwing introduces himself as Batman’s lovechild with justice.

“I did not realize Batman had a child,” Martian Manhunter says, calmly enough that no one’s sure if he’s accidentally plucking a really loud thought out of the air or if he’s trying to make a joke.

Nightwing stares for a moment falling over laughing. He doesn’t get up. Batman starts trying to apply anti-Joker venom but Nightwing just kicks him and laughs until he cries. He keeps trying to wipe his eyes and his mask keeps getting in the way, so he asks everyone to leave so he can please get a hold of himself

He is still laughing when they leave. Everyone is confused. Batman is furious.  Nightwing manages to breathe long enough to say, “We’re just so glad you’re socializing now, Batman.”

Superman turns to look at Batman very slowly. “…’we’?”

Keep reading
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Hey, just a word of warning to all my followers, please remember that it is a Class E Felony to wish harm or death upon the President of the United States . Yes, even on social media. People have gotten deported over this in the past.

I wholeheartedly support #notmypresident but unfortunately, this law would still apply. Be careful with those assassination jokes, which do qualify as a federal offense now. Stay informed and make informed decisions.

I would like to remind everyone that a few years back a I tagged a post about shady us military recruitment tactics with “I hate the military” (or something like that) and wound up with someone looking through my selfie tag from a department of defense computer.

be very careful of what you put online.

😨 scary

this will undoubtedly become a bigger and bigger issue in the coming months. it’s always been something that could get you in trouble but now more than ever they’re going to be going after people who even disagree with, much less joke about assassinating the president. protect yourself
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this blog is 100% supportive of ppl who punch nazis in the face, the act of punching nazis in the face, and fully believes all nazis should be punched in the face


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