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roundworldreject:

Enough with waily waily!!! Our dear old gonnagal Terry has just gone back to the last world ye ken. We’ll see the scunner again!!! Tis not the time for wailing!!! Tis time for the flappin o the kilts and the raising of the knees!!! And fightin!! And drinking!! And snaffling coo beasties!!! CRIVENS!!!!
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“Nae king! Nae quin! Nae laird! Nae master! We willnae be fooled again!”
- traditional Nac Mac Feegle battle cry (via eka-mark)
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“Whut’s the plan, Rob?“ said one of them.
“Okay, lads, this is what we’ll do. As soon as we see somethin’, we’ll attack it. Right?”
This caused a cheer.
“Ach, ‘tis a good plan,” said Daft Wullie.”
- Terry Pratchett - The Wee Free Men (via terrypratchettparadise)
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2scRPqa:Terry Pratchett's 'The Wee Free Men' is getting a movie adaptation from the Jim Henson Company:

thebibliosphere:

amemait:

thebibliosphere:

thelittlegreenproblem:

thebibliosphere:

the-tao-of-fandom:

thebibliosphere:

meabhair:

hellotailor:

With a screenplay by Rhianna Pratchett, daughter of Terry Pratchett, we’re finally going to see an adaptation of The Wee Free Men.

The Wee Free Men introduced Tiffany Aching, the young witch who starred in several of Pratchett’s last Discworld books. It also features a group of Discworld characters who seem absolutely perfect for a Jim Henson movie: the Nac Mac Feegle, a community of foul-mouthed and gleefully violent gnomes.

[READ MORE]

*HIGH PITCHED SCREAMING*

i hope this is glorious

@thebibliosphere have you seen this?

I’ve been indisposed for most of the day but yes! I saw it on Facebook and promptly lost my shit for a good few minutes. I am very excited to see how this turns out :)

Excite! Also:

“The Discworld series offers a wide range of genres and characters, and the Ankh Morpork City Watch books (a series of law enforcement adventure stories) are probably the most obvious choice for a Hollywood adaptation. Unfortunately, the humor and absurdity of the Discworld series just doesn’t fit with the expectation that adult fantasy stories should be dark and gritty, likeLord of the Rings, Game of Thrones, and Warcraft.” 

…Who’s gonna tell them?

It’s my honest opinion that Hollywood couldn’t handle Discworld at it’s darkest.

It would want to take Sam Vimes and either make him into their kind of Good Hero (who are generally neither), or it would make him into the Villain, because they wouldn’t know what to do with a character like him. They wouldn’t know what to do with a man who is cynical and dark and terrified of his own thoughts and so filled with rage he becomes a beacon of light and hope instead.

They wouldn’t know what to do with Lady Sybil other than make her into a jolly fat woman who dotes on her “barely-tolerating-husband” and has an eccentric hobby in breeding dragons. They wouldn’t make her tall and fat and so sure of herself you could bounce a nuclear missile off her self confidence. They most certainly wouldn’t allow Sam and her to have a sex life, or if they did they’d kill her in childbirth because that’s “Realistic™”, right?

They wouldn’t know what to do with a woman like Granny Weatherwax without making her lament her spinsterhood, or twisting her magic into something dark and fueled by loneliness. They wouldn’t know what to do with an old baggage like Nanny Ogg without turning her into pure comedic relief for Granny’s darkness, when what she actually is is incredibly complex and powerful in her own right because Nanny’s power is not having to use magic at all.

They’d take Tiffany Aching and make her “spunky” and a rebel, when in fact all Tiffany wanted to do was make sure no one ever got hurt for being different ever again.

Brother Brutha would become a fated prophet when all he was was a simple man who believed in being kind and changed an entire religion and culture simply by being so.

Vetinari would become a monster, an evil man who controlled the city with an iron grip, not because he loved it, but because he can, when Vetinari never wants power, not really. He’s a tyrant yes, but only because the world is so profoundly messed up that it needed someone to get to the top and say “No, no more…” and sometimes the world needs good men to do bad things, because as much as Hollywood might want to make us believe, bad men rarely do good.

Death would either become cold and uncaring or tragic, when he is in fact neither. Death is not justice and he knows this, Death is just death, so he tries to be kind and do his job as efficiently as possible because at the end of the day, that’s what is required of him. Susan would become this hard nosed bitter “don’t talk to me” bitch with the powers of Death and would constantly suffer the urge to use it on “bad people” because that’s what Hollywood does to women with any kind of power, when Susan is actually the Goth version of Mary Poppins and also considerably kinder because she takes the fear of children and teaches them how to make it into a weapon against the thing that frightens them. She knows they don’t need to be told there are no monsters under the bed because there are, what she does instead, is show them that monsters can be beaten. She empowers them in a way children rarely are, and she does it without a spoonful of sugar because that shit will rot your teeth.

Carrot would become the fallen King, banished from his realm and forever longing for a throne he can never have when in fact he chose, he chose to carry a lantern and walk the streets at night because the night might well be dark and full of terrors, but it doesn’t have to be.

Hollywood wouldn’t know how to handle Discworld at it’s darkest, because at its darkest Discworld is so overwhelmingly human in its need for hope it hurts. And Hollywood doesn’t deal with human, it deals with tropes, and that’s what is wrong with the majority of mainstream media at the moment. People are not tropes. 

As for the whole idea of “the world is dark and terrible so we all must be grim faced and stoic”, like have you been to a funeral? Do you know how many people laugh at funerals? Do you know how many people smile, and hug and kiss and cling to each other with such profound love because that’s what humans do? We look at the darkness and we follow the sunrise. Grief might be the price we pay for love, but that doesn’t make love a weakness.

And Jim Henson understood that. His family, understands that. And it makes me happy that it’s them who are involved in this adaptation of The Wee Free Men.

Is this some kind of Sales/Marketing ploy? If so, its incredibly effective because I have just ordered myself some Terry Pratchett

You know those people that go door to door asking if you’ve found Jesus yet? I’m that person but with Terry Pratchett and enthusiastic leaflets about dragons and a t-shirt that says “Ask Me About Discworld” except I don’t knock on your door, I just scream relentlessly into the void and hope someone else gets to experience my joy.

@thebibliosphere Don’t lie we know you’re really Constable Visit-The-Discworld-Unknowing-With-Explanatory-Charts.

Oh wow, this post is going around again. And you got me. Would anyone like to see my notes *unfurls parchment that hits the ground and never stops rolling*
rakasha: (Default)
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lemonsharks:

nonasuch:

stardust-rain:

“He wanted to go home. He wanted it so much that he trembled at the thought. But if the price of that was selling good men to the night, if the price was filling those graves, if the price was not fighting with every trick he knew… Then it was too high.”

➽ Idris Elba old Vimes // John Boyega as young Vimes

oh my god my entire mental picture of Sam Vimes just completely rewrote itself and it’s never ever changing back because this is SO MUCH BETTER

OH MY GOD

@lectorel @elenothar
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theshepherdscrown:

They did the job they didn’t have to do, and they died doing it, and you can’t give them anything. 
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via http://ift.tt/2rYJRxk:
alda-rana:

Happy Glorious 25th of May, Discworlders! May your lilacs bloom and your angels rise up high!

Oh, and GNU Terry Pratchett of course :)

@elenothar
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discworldtour:

“Yes, sir,” Ponder disagreed.

– on talking to managers | Terry Pratchett, Ian Stewart, and Jack Cohen, The Science of Discworld
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cakesandfail:

Discworld x Tolkien crossover where Vimes arrests the One Ring for being an accessory to murder

Not mine, but an all-time favorite:

Evidence
By: CamwynSummary: Maedhros and Maglor sneak into Eonwe’s camp at the end of the War of Wrath- but the Silmarils are missing. A Silm Discworld crossover!

@elenothar @urloth @greenekangaroo
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2mawisP:
elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

hamelin-born:

Headcanon: Real!Percival Graves took lessons from the Sam Vimes School of Policing.

…I now can’t stop imagining Graves displaying the classic Sam Vimes reaction whenever someone mentions ‘the divine right of kings’.

For your consideration: Picquery getting Graves to do things simply by telling him to stay out of it while counting on his immediate ‘the hell I will’ reaction.

Percival Graves. In the Congress Chamber. With the axe.

Percival Graves reading ‘Where’s My Cow?’ to the occamys every night at 6 o’clock. Percival Graves struggling with the Summoning Dark. Percival Graves defeating the Summoning Dark by being aggressively himself.

Percival Graves holding up his right hand and gravely intoning “I comma square bracket recruit’s name square bracket comma do solemnly swear by square bracket recruit’s deity of choice square bracket to uphold the Laws and Ordinances of the city of New York -”

The threat of Percival Graves going spare hanging over every auror who messed up. ‘Graves will go spare’ is the ultimate deterrent whispered to the foolish who’re about to do something stupid.

Percival Graves wearing his shoes down until they’re about to fall off, because it lets him feel the city streets through his boots.

Percival Graves sitting on the steps of the Woolworth building with a cup of hot chocolate.

Percival Graves and Gondulphus ‘Old Stoneface’ Graves.

Percival Graves falling for Newt Scamander, the man who’s far too attached to dragons and literally spends all his time caring for his creatures.

Percival Graves struggling through the need to make all the shit he sees in his work easier to bear through alcohol. Percival Graves keeping a bottle of firewhiskey in his desk drawer just to prove that he can, never touching it.

Percival Graves and the Beast.

Percival Graves stopping a war by arresting both sides.

Percival Graves whispering “You’re nicked, chum!” as he tackles the serial killer who killed two of his aurors.

Percival Graves insisting on going after an unpredictable serial killing dark wizard himself, having given strict instructions to his aurors to keep out of it because they’ll try to do it by the book and it’s going to get them killed.

Percival Graves, due to an accident with a time-turner, being his own mentor.

Percival Graves being slightly horrified by just how naive his younger self was. Jesus Christ, kid, stop expecting the best of people (even if you’ll always defend them) and definitely stop blindly taking orders from those crooked aurors you had to call boss.

Percival Graves thinking longingly of Picquery‘s term in office, carefully keeping his face straight as he hears his younger self talking enthusiastically on how the latest Presidential candidate is definitely For the People, and how thing will be so much better when the current President is gone.

Is this really me? Graves wonders. Did I really have the political awareness of a head louse? And the self-preservation instincts of a lemming?

Percival Graves close to losing all hope stuck in the past, when his pocket watch - the one that Newt gave him after the Niffler refused to return Graves’ old one - is returned. He draws his fingers over the engraved initials, thinks of the future waiting for him and soldiers on.

Percival Graves, ordered the rioting population to take down that fucking barricade! And re-build it at the end of the street! And build another one at that corner there! Move it, people, they don’t have much time!

(On an aside, I considered Percival Graves arresting a dragon, but then realized that Newt would pout at him. And give him the wet, teary eyes, and - well, Graves would be very distracted.)
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2lJegvO:
elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

hamelin-born:

Headcanon: Real!Percival Graves took lessons from the Sam Vimes School of Policing.

…I now can’t stop imagining Graves displaying the classic Sam Vimes reaction whenever someone mentions ‘the divine right of kings’.

For your consideration: Picquery getting Graves to do things simply by telling him to stay out of it while counting on his immediate ‘the hell I will’ reaction.

Percival Graves. In the Congress Chamber. With the axe.

Percival Graves reading ‘Where’s My Cow?’ to the occamys every night at 6 o’clock. Percival Graves struggling with the Summoning Dark. Percival Graves defeating the Summoning Dark by being aggressively himself.

Percival Graves holding up his right hand and gravely intoning “I comma square bracket recruit’s name square bracket comma do solemnly swear by square bracket recruit’s deity of choice square bracket to uphold the Laws and Ordinances of the city of New York -”

The threat of Percival Graves going spare hanging over every auror who messed up. ‘Graves will go spare’ is the ultimate deterrent whispered to the foolish who’re about to do something stupid.

Percival Graves wearing his shoes down until they’re about to fall off, because it lets him feel the city streets through his boots.

Percival Graves sitting on the steps of the Woolworth building with a cup of hot chocolate.

Percival Graves and Gondulphus ‘Old Stoneface’ Graves.

Percival Graves falling for Newt Scamander, the man who’s far too attached to dragons and literally spends all his time caring for his creatures.

Percival Graves struggling through the need to make all the shit he sees in his work easier to bear through alcohol. Percival Graves keeping a bottle of firewhiskey in his desk drawer just to prove that he can, never touching it.

Percival Graves and the Beast.
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2lrWGAm:
elenothar:

hamelin-born:

elenothar:

hamelin-born:

hamelin-born:

Headcanon: Real!Percival Graves took lessons from the Sam Vimes School of Policing.

…I now can’t stop imagining Graves displaying the classic Sam Vimes reaction whenever someone mentions ‘the divine right of kings’.

For your consideration: Picquery getting Graves to do things simply by telling him to stay out of it while counting on his immediate ‘the hell I will’ reaction.

Percival Graves. In the Congress Chamber. With the axe.

Percival Graves reading ‘Where’s My Cow?’ to the occamys every night at 6 o’clock. Percival Graves struggling with the Summoning Dark. Percival Graves defeating the Summoning Dark by being aggressively himself.

Percival Graves holding up his right hand and gravely intoning “I comma square bracket recruit’s name square bracket comma do solemnly swear by square bracket recruit’s deity of choice square bracket to uphold the Laws and Ordinances of the city of New York -”
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2kEwn5C:
elenothar:

hamelin-born:

hamelin-born:

Headcanon: Real!Percival Graves took lessons from the Sam Vimes School of Policing.

…I now can’t stop imagining Graves displaying the classic Sam Vimes reaction whenever someone mentions ‘the divine right of kings’.

For your consideration: Picquery getting Graves to do things simply by telling him to stay out of it while counting on his immediate ‘the hell I will’ reaction.

Percival Graves. In the Congress Chamber. With the axe.
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2lhs04E:
hamelin-born:

Headcanon: Real!Percival Graves took lessons from the Sam Vimes School of Policing.

…I now can’t stop imagining Graves displaying the classic Sam Vimes reaction whenever someone mentions ‘the divine right of kings’.
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2l1TOrj:
incorrectdiscworldquotes:

someone: what’s a mob to a king

sam vimes: historically, fatal

(source: jewishzevran tumblr post)

@aethelar

@lectorel

@darthrevaan
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“T'dr'duzk b'hazg t’t!”
-

Cheri’s battle cry while charging the golem. Translation: Today Is A Good Day For Someone Else To Die!

– Terry Pratchett, Feet of Clay

(via discworldtour)
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exploringcastleoblivion:

Discworld crossover with PoTC where Vetinari performs the wedding ceremony for Vimes and Sybil in the middle of the huge maelstrom battle.
rakasha: (Default)
via http://ift.tt/2aRYm0Y:
thebibliosphere:

goddamnshinyrock:

Every time I recommend Discworld to someone, I get asked “where should I start?” There are several reading order guides floating around the internet, but they just give the order of each series, they don’t give you any information on which to base a choice of starter novel. For that, use this handy (and very biased, okay, I admit it) flow chart! 

For everyone one who has been asking ME where to start (I’m sorry I don’t reply to you all I get asked this so often) this is an exceedingly good chart.
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via http://ift.tt/2amxat7:
“Elves are wonderful. They provoke wonder.
Elves are marvellous. They cause marvels.
Elves are fantastic. They create fantasies.
Elves are glamorous. They project glamour.
Elves are enchanting. They weave enchantment.
Elves are terrific. They beget terror.
The thing about words is that meanings can twist just like a snake, and if you want to find snakes look for them behind words that have changed their meaning.
No one ever said elves are nice.
Elves are bad.”
-

Terry Pratchett {Lords & Ladies}

This, to me is the most chilling paragraph in any Discworld novel.

(via bisonasaurus)

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