![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
rakashavia https://ift.tt/2tNp1rn
You know the One Movie I will never stop being salty about?
Solomon Kane.
And not for the reasons that you’re probably thinking of. I enjoyed the movie, more or less, when all is said and done - it’s simply. Well.
The entire hassle of Getting To See The Damn Thing in the First Place.
SO.
First, I have a fondness for the Solomon Kane franchise. My initial introduction to them consisted of me borrowing the book from my SO for the oldest and most valid of literary reasons - it had a cool cover, and the blurb on the back interested me enough to read it. And so, a few years down the line, when I hear that a movie is coming out, I’m happy about it.
And so I wait. And Wait. And wait for the Damn Thing to become available in my country.
Keep in mind that this was set primarily the days before Netflix. Meaning, that the only Netflix I interested with on a regular basis was when I rented DVDs from them. Yes, this was the era of DVDs - more than that? It was the era of Blockbusters. And I waited and waited and waited for Solomon Kane to become available via one of them.
Except it never freaking did.
Finally, driven to the depths of despair - and also the first faint stirrings of rage - I ended up buying the damn thing online.
And then waiting. And waiting. And waiting for the DVD to arrive.
Which it eventually did. To much (private) rejoicing.
So! I have the DVD. I have the snacks. I have the company (my SO, who is - vaguely amused by everything that’s going down, and happy enough to watch it with me.) And so I insert the DVD into the DVD player.
Except the damn thing won’t start.
Because it was made in a foreign country, and it is incompatible with the DVD player.
I wanted to throw something. Very hard. It right in front of me but I can’t play the DVD. And I don’t want to muck around with the DVD player settings because 1) I’m honestly kind of terrible at that and 2) This DVD player isn’t mine. Plus, there was something along the lines about how changing the settings like that might result in a permanent alteration thereof? I’m not sure.
So the DVD of Solomon Kane just. Sits there. Taunting me. For months. And by now it has become a point of pride more then anything else - I am going to watch that movie. BECAUSE. Until - and I can’t remember if my frustration got the best of me, enough to say ‘fuck it’ and just go at the settings with all this subtlety of a blowtorch, or I basically begged more tech-friendly acquaintances to Fix This please.
And I finally, finally, get the chance to watch the damn movie.
…literally a week later the DVD became available in the United States. On Netflix. Maybe even at Blockbusters; I misremember. But you can imagine my reaction at this movie becoming oh so easily (and cheaply) available, after everything I went through to watch it.
And that is the story of why I will forevermore be Salty with regards to Solomon Kane: The Movie.
(Your picture was not posted)
You know the One Movie I will never stop being salty about?
Solomon Kane.
And not for the reasons that you’re probably thinking of. I enjoyed the movie, more or less, when all is said and done - it’s simply. Well.
The entire hassle of Getting To See The Damn Thing in the First Place.
SO.
First, I have a fondness for the Solomon Kane franchise. My initial introduction to them consisted of me borrowing the book from my SO for the oldest and most valid of literary reasons - it had a cool cover, and the blurb on the back interested me enough to read it. And so, a few years down the line, when I hear that a movie is coming out, I’m happy about it.
And so I wait. And Wait. And wait for the Damn Thing to become available in my country.
Keep in mind that this was set primarily the days before Netflix. Meaning, that the only Netflix I interested with on a regular basis was when I rented DVDs from them. Yes, this was the era of DVDs - more than that? It was the era of Blockbusters. And I waited and waited and waited for Solomon Kane to become available via one of them.
Except it never freaking did.
Finally, driven to the depths of despair - and also the first faint stirrings of rage - I ended up buying the damn thing online.
And then waiting. And waiting. And waiting for the DVD to arrive.
Which it eventually did. To much (private) rejoicing.
So! I have the DVD. I have the snacks. I have the company (my SO, who is - vaguely amused by everything that’s going down, and happy enough to watch it with me.) And so I insert the DVD into the DVD player.
Except the damn thing won’t start.
Because it was made in a foreign country, and it is incompatible with the DVD player.
I wanted to throw something. Very hard. It right in front of me but I can’t play the DVD. And I don’t want to muck around with the DVD player settings because 1) I’m honestly kind of terrible at that and 2) This DVD player isn’t mine. Plus, there was something along the lines about how changing the settings like that might result in a permanent alteration thereof? I’m not sure.
So the DVD of Solomon Kane just. Sits there. Taunting me. For months. And by now it has become a point of pride more then anything else - I am going to watch that movie. BECAUSE. Until - and I can’t remember if my frustration got the best of me, enough to say ‘fuck it’ and just go at the settings with all this subtlety of a blowtorch, or I basically begged more tech-friendly acquaintances to Fix This please.
And I finally, finally, get the chance to watch the damn movie.
…literally a week later the DVD became available in the United States. On Netflix. Maybe even at Blockbusters; I misremember. But you can imagine my reaction at this movie becoming oh so easily (and cheaply) available, after everything I went through to watch it.
And that is the story of why I will forevermore be Salty with regards to Solomon Kane: The Movie.
(Your picture was not posted)
